Who is the Best Expert?
We live in an exciting age. Multiple streams of information course through our slightest touch of hand. Devices access the latest book on optimal performance, stress release, the best nutrition, the hottest workout. Expert after expert, authority after authority, tells us just how it’s done. Research is expanding and we are beginning to understand health and wellness on multiple levels, from genes to social connectivity to our interaction with nature, from tiny molecules of emotion to electromagnetic coherence.
How do you parse through the information?
Which coach do you choose?
Which book is best to read?
I agree, completely, it is excellent to find a person who has passion for one particular thing, and then to follow them and try what they have said, and notice if you feel more optimal. More well being. Less stress. A quicker mind. A more agile body.
And, at the same time, there is an authority in your life who may have even more to tell you.
How to be the best you.
Your best self.
Becoming self aware is key to knowing your best self. Self reflection can be a key to true happiness, harmony, and freedom to live the life that you dare to dream.
In the gorgeous structure of your mind, there is an area called the insula. Although it is not solely responsible for self reflection, it is one of the key areas in a connected pattern of hub to hub activity that is involved in noticing the self (1).
How do you feel when you are deeply self aware?
There can be a joy in sheer authenticity. Those moments when you feel the most you. Whether you enter flow state and all the world seems to disappear and the moment becomes timeless, or whether you share from such a deep pure place with others that the moment feels magical, and is treasured and remembered often.
There can also be pain and sadness when coming to terms with the darker areas of your self. Admitting defeat, loneliness, a fault, a loss, a mistake, a wound, a past trauma, an addiction, a fear, a shame. Here there is a trial by fire of truly facing your self, and coming to terms with what drives you, motivates you, causes you to choose action in the world.
Although these times can be trying, they are a crucible of sorts, where you distill the truth and emerge with clarity and ideally a stronger and more natural motivation to create a satisfying lifestyle. A way of life that has deep meaning, and a truth to it that resounds with you. That aligns you to the bliss of wisdom, discovery, truth.
So how do you begin?
In some ways, it is tricky. We are not always aware of how we are, and how we behave. In several studies where individuals predicted their future behaviour, results ranged in accuracy from 27 to 50 percent (2). Also, as Herwig and colleagues point out, there is both an active state of self-reflection, and a concurrent “resting state” associated with something called the default mode network. So the mind is both active and passive as it wanders through the process of self reflection.
The quest to know one self has been a theme throughout the ages. Yoga, martial arts, science, the dreamtime practice, shamanism . . . many of these time-honoured traditions study the self in both an approach to tangible matter and the less tangible mysterious realms of psyche and soul.
Why know the self?
As above, it can lead to a life of balance and integrity, happiness and harmony.
Also, it can protect from surprises or help you prepare for reactions that suddenly emerge from the darker aspects of self. Or free you from the pains of the past determining your future choices in an adverse manner.
Knowing the self also leads to more freedom. As you peel back the layers of assumptions and limiting beliefs, you start to sense how truly magnificent the human soul can be. How intelligent. How vibrant. How naturally endowed with optimism, enthusiasm, wisdom, patience, kindness, and a keen agility for life, the core part of you is. Full of alacrity for your next moment.
You can simply start to observe the endless mystery that is you, by noticing when you feel comfort, and when you feel discomfort. When you feel a buoyant energy, and when you feel drained.
Take a step further by noticing how you respond to information. In a class, when reading a book, or learning a new system, when you are receiving advice from a consultant. If you invite your self to consider that you are the expert on you, how do you respond to this incoming information?
For example, how might you move through a yoga pose in class? As if you were discovering it for the first time, like a scientist observing a new experiment, or a choreographer performing a new movement.
Or, how would you respond to the information in a board meeting? As if you were an expert within a certain area of the chosen topic, and pulling from pockets of experience that are unique to your life experience.
Or, how would you respond in a conversation? As if you had something truly valuable to offer. Pearls worthy of leadership, or beauty that casts a spell of transcendence into the present moment.
A PERSONAL NOTE
I believe that we can all be leaders. By finding the truth that sings sweetly or strongly within our hearts, that resounds with integrity through our bodies, that creates a feeling of congruence, alignment, harmony, within our cells and minds. That harnesses our intelligence in a magical and mystical way to be powerful creators of magnificence and beauty in our lives.
Yes, we have to go through the fire, sometimes, to get there. We have to face all kinds of fears and doubts and what we perceive as failings in ourselves. But the reward, of speaking our truth, acting from integrity, honouring our wisdom and that of others, giving generously into the world and receiving beautifully that which life has presented us - in here there is an acceptance, endless opportunity, and the wild ride of exploring the many possibilities of expressing your self.
You are the expert, on you.
A LAST WORD
I so enjoy working with people to help them find their inner strength, confidence, beauty, truth. If you want to experience more deeply the inner realms of your self, sense the magic and mystery of how profound the inner layers of your psyche are, face challenges like crucibles to emerge triumphant with more freedom of creating the life you want to lead, and perhaps creating a better world for all, and want some guidance to move past blocks that you are having trouble seeing past, then contact me to inquire into a session.
I offer guidance through facilitating a reflective process that is a blend of mindfulness, psychotherapy, and a deep dive into the layers of consciousness to see your neural network patterning and potentially shift it for more ease in former areas of struggle.
Ideally, I support a process that leads you to a greater sense of purpose, wisdom, beauty, intelligence, brilliance for you.
Join me to learn more about your expertise on the magic of you, and how you can transform you world for more optimal living.
Three approaches to work with me:
Referral by your family doctor for an initial visit covered by MSP for BC residents with a valid PHN. Referrals are accepted for sleep problems, anxiety, and adjustment.
For private pay sessions, contact me to set up an initial brief phone call or initial visit.
Meet me at a workshop or talk by contacting me and asking to go on the notification list for upcoming events.
Wishing you the best, always,
Dr. M. ~
Herwig et al. 2012. “Neural activity associated with self-reflection.” In: BMC Neurosci 13: 52. Download PDF1
Vazire & Carlson 2010. “Self Knowledge of Personality: do people know themselves?” In: Social and Personality Psychology Compass 4(8):605 - 620. Download PDF2